Well. THAT was a nice little implosion, wasn't it?
(you either know what I'm going to be talking about, or you don't. Either way, it's gonna be a funny post, if:
A) you're as cynical as me, and/or
B) you're not one of the people I TOLD SO.
All other applicants: sorry, this post is more about you than it is for you.
And for the record, I realize this point in my life may have a fair number of anomalies in it; things that wouldn't normally happen simply because the crazy little microcosm that is college doesn't go on forever. I do realize (tho have never felt) certain pressures that this campus lends itself towards (like dating). Everyone can stop bitching about them. We all know peer pressure exists.
We're also adults. So deal with it.
I know certain things are easier to do in college - be immature, make friends, make memories, and get infatuated. But all that isn't worth the time it's taking up if perspective is completely thrown out the door. And that's where my hunches apparently come into play.
When that voice in your head is the only opinion you're NOT listening to, heads up jackass, because it's gonna be a bumpy ride. I was lucky enough to survive emotionally intact, mostly because everyone assumes I'm a heartless jerk with no emotions, but also because God will keep me going through every stumbling mess I make, and builds me up like there's no tomorrow.
God made me pretty self-sufficient. I'm pretty confident that I need NO ONE that I don't already have, so 'don't worry about me' has become my new most common saying. The messes I make are the ones I deal with, and I have dealt. The only difference is that I can speak my mind when necessary, possibly risking personal pain for the sake of the pain of others. But self-proclaimed humility isn't worth the pixels it's typed with, so take it for what it's worth.
Moving on.
Anyway. I have neglected this venting tool for a while, and as you can see, a lot has happened in the last few months. Took the GRE. Did not do that great. Might have to take it again. Collective 'ugh' on that one.
Classes are ok for the most part. Genetics has this nasty knack for forcing me to really bring out my best effort all the time.
DAMN I am such a procrastinating idiot...I have got to get these grad school apps done soon! Can't wait till second semester when this headache will be over...regardless of where I get accepted.
Certain music albums are getting me through these weeks of my life, and I am grateful that God has given me that outlet to be relieved of stress through passively listening. Might write about that next, actually...
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